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And on the bad days......

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And on the bad days...... Empty And on the bad days......

Post by Dameon Mon 30 Oct 2017, 11:01 pm

I sit here, drinking myself stupid, trying to figure out why I'm so depressed, and how this happened to me. On good days I feel like a fraud, on the bad days I just wish I could stop breathing, as if somehow that would fix everything. PTSD sucks! And what's worse is that the idea of soldiers suffering from this brings me to tears. We gave too much. To all those who live with this monkey on their back, I'm sorry, for all of us. November is a hard month, or at least harder than the other 11 hard months. There are times when I think the fallen are the lucky ones, and then I just feel shame, as I know that I may yet find peace, and they will never get the chance. I continue to live because I can, and try my best to enjoy that which has been stolen from my brothers. May they never be forgotten.

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Post by Nemo Mon 30 Oct 2017, 11:30 pm

I hope u can reach out to someone and get some help. Unfortunately, drinking makes things worse. I just had a family member drink themselves to death.

I know with the right help, some with PTSD can improve. Perhaps some on here that deal with PTSD can help You get some resources to help u deal with it.


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Post by Trooper Tue 31 Oct 2017, 7:24 am

I agree with Nemo, drinking makes it worse.

I think a lot of medically released service members suffer from either PTSD or some level of depression. Alcohol and a lot of different types of prescribed medications can certainly make things worse. Alcohol is a quick short lived fix which if not taken in moderation can lead to the worsening of any mental or medical conditions you have, certain medications can also have long term effects both mentally and physically. In my own personal experience it wasn't until I gave up drinking altogether, and  weaned off most of my meds, and went to a more natural path for relieving my symptoms that things started to improve for me. I'm not suggesting people stop taking their meds, what I'm saying is do some research before taking what is prescribed, they maybe alternative to what is prescribed that is proven to give less side effects, or even a natural method or herbs that can be substituted. I think on bad days one needs to find control within themselves, they need to take control of their body and mind, don't allow it to escalate into a deeper situation. I realize sometimes this is easier said then done, fair enough, but one should never give up, once you give up you have lost control of yourself, and nothing good ever comes from that. We all have a purpose in life whether you believe it or not, we are blessed with having a life to live through in good times and in bad times, we need to overcome those bad times, or bad days we endure throughout our lives. Those that find themselves struggling, my advice would be to work at finding your purpose in life, make changes if need be, the most important thing you need to do is to take control of yourself, don't allow anything to get in your way.
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Post by Dameon Tue 31 Oct 2017, 10:35 pm

Thanks guys. I am getting help. And as much as I wish I was all better, I know that road is a long and winding one. In a perfect world.....

Tonight I drink tea. The pain is the same.

But at least I'll go to bed with a clear head.

Again, thank you, and I apologize for unloading my baggage.

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Post by Nemo Wed 01 Nov 2017, 1:29 pm

No need to apologize. This is what this forum is for. Wink

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